Elusive 31

Tell me have you seen her

Cause I can only read her

In the pages of the scripture

That’s where she always features

With all internal features

That makes beauty her vesture

Compassion in each gesture

I see her I see her

She makes me a believer 

First, to never seek her

But The One Whose love does feed her 

The One Who is her Fire

Her First, Her Most, Entire

And here I am a liar

I aim to be supplier

To His daughter I admire

But cleave to me and she’s in mire
Others scatter for the tens

But I’m looking for 31

And primes are only divided by One

They catching them with game

But I only have one aim

Be what He wants me to be

Set the captives free

More ready to die than B.I.G

Than give sin the victory

Him in me the hope of glory

Till 31 I see

I hope it’s not me that she sees

More of Him and less of me

This ain’t a game to me

So I’m catching her on my knees


Besides The Point

We are angry because we 

Love to see

Jason Bourne get chased down through streets
With the possibility of getting his head blown off
And when the bad guy gets the snot kicked out of him we smile
We jump out our seat
But what you do in your free time is besides the point

Maybe we are angry because we think God is like us
That He is watching all the suffering and that
In His heart, sparks of amusement, a twinge
As The Almighty sits back to watch and to binge
The murder, violence ,rape, ravage, destruction, suffering
That maybe this is all entertainment to Him

The same way you sit on your couch and see her get raped
And you don't turn it off
Or the multiple slaughters and killing streaks make you smile
You can't shake the feeling that God has been doing exactly that all the while
That He is smirking as He watches our kids and pedophiles

We get mad because when with the opportunity to help those in need we are faced
We ignore them and so we think God does the same

Maybe we are angry because we think He is like us
And not that we think He is working to make us like Him
We create Him in our image
Like characters in the series the producers have imaged

Could it be that binge watching has made us think He does the same
Maybe that's beside the point again

Okay, so what is going on?

If there is anyone who wants this done, it is God
If there is anyone who's heart is broken, it is God's

But even I wouldn't let all this cruelty happen you say
What shows up on your 51 inch screen for pleasure says differently
But that is besides the point

He is able to do everything why doesn't He stop it at least
Stop all the suffering, evil is having a feast

Good point when someone who can do everything is not doing what you expect does that mean they are doing nothing?
A doctor may sometimes deal with the symptoms
A healer may give health to the dying
But God's aim is to restore and resurrection
And that means not just dealing with suffering, murder and lust
But dealing with sin and yet, still remain just
And that means dealing with the accusation on His character, earning our trust.

Imagine if you were halfway in teating cancer
Then you in your wisodm stop treatment altogether
You know that it will come back but you couldn't bare to see them in pain anymore.
Or if every mother in pain gave up in labour.
She chooses instead to still give new life despite the pain
So imagine the heavenly choice but maybe that is besides the point again 

Sin is to choose anything against the perfect will of God. 
The thought that there is a safer, wiser, better way than God's.
To choose that God got it wrong.
There was once a time when all beings were in line with God's will
And then another will accused God of missing the point

And the cancer started, sin.
In order to restore from sin
You do not kill the sinner, but you kill sin
I guess we would find it easier to kill the sinner
Afterall, it was their choice.
But in His love, He chooses to get between us and sin
And restore us to a position where we can live like Him
He not only separates us from sin
But paid the penalty of which we were deserving
And make sure it is not in remission
But never to rise a second time, never again
In order to do that you have to give everyone a choice.
You can't rape for love has a choice
You can't make the choice for them
Because if it is not their choice to trust His will
Sin will rise again

Like a wife who doesn't trust her spouse
Will worry and talk about him every time he leaves the house
Married by ring but but not in heart
Again, that is besides the point

The mercy of God is from everlasting to everalsting
Behold what manner of love the Father hath bestowed
To open His arms and pour out all heaven 
So that some by grace may enter in

Now the heavens watch in anticipation
Men who don't understand everything
But by faith can grasp eternity
Are glued to their televisions
But that's besides the point.

Not Hungry 

When Samson was with prostitutes

Harlots and all that that constitutes

It was not because of loneliness

And if so, he could have endured the test 

Because lonely don’t lead to death
Pan over and we see Joseph

Torn from family, betreayed in the process

On the rise and rise, head of all his boss posessed

It’s evident the bitter loneliness

And here are the caressing arms of a temptress

Literally begging him and it wasnt for bed rest
Joseph and Samson both had the urge

By their choice each decided what would govern
When Adam ate the fruit, it wasn’t for sake of hunger

Twas not an empty stomach to the sway of sin he went under
But Jesus hungered

Whether He could turn stone to bread was not His wonder

But if bread was worth tearing assunder

His faith in the Word of The Father
When God rested twas not that He was faint

Of drowsiness there wasn’t a taint

He created Sabbath with His Creation to commune 

Now “I’m tired” is the choice for me and you
It’s not that there weren’t plenty of fruits on the trees

But the command was, “You only need listen to Me”

Put in her stead  we wouldn’t have eaten like Eve?

From what we do with time, it’s hard to believe 
It’s not that we don’t have time

Six days are yours and mine

And yet we eat of the seconds that are blessed by Divine 
Today, today you have the choice

You hear the call, you here the voice

The pull, the urge is no excuse

You have a choice, you have a choice
Don’t use the passions to steer your fate

Your will with God’s cooperate

Sufficient enough is His grace

If it it were not why pay the price paid 

The cross to put you back in place
It’s time to realise you’re not hungry

Who do I choose is the quandry

A higher calling 

Or to lower passions falling 

​What If I ToldYou

What if I told you
That God was not going to give you all that you want Him to

That those you pray for may see death too
What if I told you

God expected something from you

To see the light that He has shown you to shine through

And not to represent it by tattoo
What if I told you

That God’s love is not earned by your preaching

Or that you are not saved by teaching

Or that love is not what Hollywood has you believing

And that there won’t be Game of Thrones or HBO when this life you will be leaving
What if I told you

God wants you to sell all you have now

To build a character worthy of the offered crown

Would that make you walk away with a frown
What if I told you

Not everyone is going to make it to heaven

That you need to get the oil now before hour eleven

That there is a first and second resurrection
What if I told you

That God won’t teach you lessons in prosperity

When your final exam is in poverty

That He won’t teach you self-pride and indulgence

When He needs you humble and in Him dependent
What if I told you

God made a way to save us from sin

Unlike the popular belief that He saves us in

That He saves us while we were in

But He has no intention

Of keeping us that way, once we submit to Him
What if I told you

You may not have to die for your faith

Instead, for you, it is live you have to face

A life sentence as a Christian
What if I told you

Would it make you turn away?

Would it put a hole in your hope and stay?

Would it poke a hole in your prosperity?

Would you still follow day by day?

​A Letter From The Pulpit

The church was packed from the front to the back. The crowds had been done with praising the name of LORD. The songs had swayed the multitude into an excitement an anticipation. And now they all awaited as the preacher was about to step out and speak. The song leader backed away into a seat and the pulpit stood empty. The spot light shone down on it as if an angel was about to descend with a message direct from God.

But there had been some nervous enrgy in the front as the leaders fidgeted and poked each other. They had walked in and out of the service with phones to their ears and cowls on their faces.

Finally the pulpit had an occupant. But it was not who they expected.

Where was the Pastor? He was nicely dressed and all but he was not the Pastor.

"I bet you are all wondering where the Pastor is."
He coughed, cleared his throat and looked at the front row of leaders and off to the side where undoubtedly there were more leaders gesturing at him to delay or just stop.
He determined to speak on.

"Well, he left a letter and I intend to read it. And while it may not be an epistle, I think it wise that it be read."

There was a dull hum of confusion from the crowd but they did not want to miss one word of the letter so as the voice read out the words the crowd hushed.

"My beloved church. And whoever happens to find this letter.
If you are reading this letter, as you can see, I am not in attendance today. It means I have finally gathered the courage to leave.

I could no longer tell the lies. I could no longer give you a sense of hope when I myself did not believe what I was preaching."

The narrator deliberatley, quickly carried on so that the crowd would stay listening. But you could hear the shock and the jaws drop in surprise.

"It is not that I do not believe in God. No. I believe He is and that He loves each and everyone of us very much. I believe that He sent His Son to die for us and that He lives now and that He is coming again to redeem His own.

This I know to be true. But it is everything else that I can't seem to continue to tell you.

How can I continue to tell the people that God is love when I see the joy that comes from every time I say you will recieve a double portion. 

Or every time I say come recieve your blessing and I see you scramble over each other to be the first, striving with each other. When I hear Christ say He who is greatest would be a servant.

Not that I do not believe God blesses. But his blessing extends far beyond material wealth. And if I told you this, I know many of you would leave.

I see it in myself and in you, my beloved. The need for self-gain. The need for the next service to be more exciting than the last. If I was to shout to this crowd about a holy life, a life like Christ's this mega church would become as empty as a tomb.

For the past couple of weeks I have been struggling with the voice of Jesus from the gospels. The picture of Him at Gethsemane. Would He struggle so much just so that I can use Him as an excuse to oppress or to take advantage of your pocket? As an excuse for you to continue to live as you please and not as God pleases and therefore live abundantly. A life content in Jesus.

His cross shows me the true character of God. I can no longer tell you about a love that is equivalent to a sugar daddy.

God has spoken to me and I thank God through Jesus Christ it is not about who you are going to marry or some money that has miraculously appeared in your purse.

He has shown me His matchless charms on the cross and that now He talks on behalf of me, for my salvation. How can I not go and cry out, Prepare the way of the LORD. For He is coming!

If I was to tell you this I know the smiles on your faces would disappear. And I couldn't bring myself to do it. I know I would have dampened your excitement.

Those who want to find me will fail. But those who wnat to find what I have found, look to His Word, look to His Bible. Pray to Him. Seek Him while He may be found. Because this world will not last forever.

He has searched my heart and I am glad I can not fool Him. He has bid me to go and I go.

Please, beloved forgive my decption. i have lead the sheep of His pasture away. But if you are willing (at least some of you will be after your wrath has subsided), turn to Him. He will in no wise cast you out.

Your former Arch Mega Apostle
Now a mere sinner saved by loving grace."

A few hours later the arena stood empty. The pulpit had one corner chipped off in the babel that ensued but it stood, silently intact.

One solitary figure, seated, stunned in contemplation. You hold your Bible with tears in your eyes as you read just how deep the Father's love is for us.

It fills you more than any worship service ever has.

“Over My Dead Body”

God was accused of being harsh of being unfeeling and that’s why He had rules. To be a tyrant to lord it over those He supposedly loved. Who, if left to themselves, would do even greater things. So God was asked to change His rules to accommodate for this and He said, “Over My dead body.” So some of those He “loved” broke the rules anyway and convinced others to do the same. And God could no longer have them safely in His home so they got kicked out and death came between them and God.
“Just change Your rules so that they can be united to you again.”
And God said “Over My dead body”
And obviously those who accused Him said, “Behold the Tyrant! He needs His rules. He will not change them because His rules are the only thing that keep Him safe. He does not know what it is like having to keep rules that can not be kept.”
So God said, “These rules can be kept. Watch.”
And He came down to those He “loved”, became one of them and lived with them and lived day by day according to His rules for 33 and a half years. The whole universe watching Him. He didn’t stumble, even when tempted over and over. He deliberately stayed Himself. Till it seemed like His rules were part of (if not His whole) character. And it looked great. He healed. He prayed. He laughed. He cried. He lived. Free. And those He “loved” started to see….love. They wanted to live like Him.
So much for “these rules can’t be kept.” 
Fine, but the ones he “loved” hadn’t kept them. So death still had to remain between God and those who wanted to love Him in return. Unless He changed His rules.
So God said “Over My dead body.”
So they said “Oh really?”
As He took the separation of those He loved upon Himself.
And they pushed Him closer and closer to death, something God had never had to subject Himself to. God was a Tyrant so there was no way that He would allow Himself to be subjected to such humiliation, torture and heartbreak. Such divide. He would surely sooner change His rules than do this. The closer He got to death He would eventually change His rules.
But God said “Over My dead body”
And He died taking on the separation and death. And yet, keeping His rules intact.
The refreshing rain of God’s justice, both of heavenly origin, met and like the rainbow lifted high in the sky, God’s character was revealed.
And God said (in a way that I still can not fully comprehend) “I accept My life and sacrifice. Death has no hold on Me. Rise My Son!” And God rose from the grave. Defeating death.
Ultimately saying “My rules can be kept. I have taken on the separation so anyone who wants to love me in return can do so over my dead body and rise again with Me. You can deliberately live day by day on this temporary earth like I did when I was with you so that you can live day by day for eternity in the safety and freedom of My character.”
“But You are a Tyrant!”
“Would a tyrant ever allow Himself to be subjected to death for others?”
“But Your rules can’t be kept.”
“Yes, they can.”
“You can keep them! They can’t!”
“I purchased their freedom from separation and give them the power to live like Me.”
“It’s too much.”
“What haven’t I done?”
“….. Just change Your rules!”
“Just change them!”
“To do so would be to change Myself and remove the safety of love and freedom of life itself.”
“Change the rules!”
“Into whose image should they change? To suit who?”
“To suit those you love!”
“Those who want to love me in return will find joy in being like Me, why would I take that away from them?”
“Change them!”
“To suit who?”
“Over My dead body.”

Not So Much 

I like the way you move

The way your skirt hugs your curves, smooth
But you
Not so much

The way your cleavage pops out the blouse
Old timers would say she’s a brick house
Diving neck line letting it all hang out
I like that without a doubt
But you
Not so much

I like how far up I can see up your thigh
We ain’t even that close and my my my
I like how far you have given freely to the eye

Of little old me the fortunate passer by
Oh I like that and of that I am not shy
But you
Not so much

How do I say this without seeming impolite
Not here to say what you wear is either wrong or right
I was just enjoying the view put in plain sight 
I have an eye for the, walk, the wiggle, the curve, 
the heel height, the tight, the plunge, 
the skin allowed to be caressed by light.

You may call me a pervert
But put my words to a beat or a guitar sweet
Watch me win a Grammy for what I say
And if I put you in the video dressed (or lack thereof) as today 
Certainly while I’m at it I’ll win 5 VMAs
And put it in the background of the next Shades of Grey
And Hey
Maybe even Oscar will smile on me
In the end that’s what I want, the rush
But you
Not so much

But about your intellect
Or the goals you have set
Or the God in whom you say your soul is blessed
Not so much

The success that you are
Your value beyond diamonds by far 

The treasure that is buried, not up your thigh but within your heart

The care, the loyalty, the hope, the ability to heal the scarred

The fire, the passion, the need to be loved
The loyalty shown when you know I’m the one

The character, the strength, the tears that would enlarge my heart

The generosity that shows the God in Whose image you are a part
Yeah all that…
Not so much

And even if I was allowed to get close enough
I just love the shape of you and all that stuff
But you
Not so much

Maybe there is some pride
To be found in how many can look but not touch
And some strength to be found in how many times you say no
But why would such precious cargo 
Be wrapped in scanty rags though

Forgive me, I am the problem here
I have been trained to see things when they appear
I am not the man I am supposed to be
Strong, committed, not taken by what my eyes see
Maybe one day I will care to see your heart

But right now all I can see is the index

And is it an accident that it reads “page 1 – Sex”
Because this apparel obviously jumped out the closet to attack you

And they seemed to have gotten a tight grip too

So as much as you want me to see you for who you are
This world has desensitized me, my eyes have scars
So under all that displayed fine cleavage and thighs
I can see and me likes
But what you want me to see when I see you

Can I see it?
Not so much
*I don’t mean to generalise or judge. I just wanted it to be seen that not every guy who gives attention to a lady is looking at her as a human being. Sometimes it is purely just as a sex object. And maybe for some that is okay. Maybe to some it is empowering. But to someone who has had to struggle with porn and all that it does to degrade a woman from her top value, as God perceives her, it’s a struggle when it seems majority of women (and men) don’t value women (or men) and all their worth. Mind, soul, and body connected as one living being. 
Let’s not lie. Clothing plays a big role in how we are perceived. And it is also an expression of who we are and we know this. It’s deliberate. Maybe this is why it touches a chord. But then again, maybe I am part of the problem. I pray I stop being so.*