Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another
A friend revealed something very private to me. It was not something he was proud of. When he told me, he couldn’t look me in the eye. He could only look at his hands as he fidgeted with his fingers and his wedding band. Either that or lift his head up and look off to the left like he expected someone to intrude on his privacy and this sacred but shameful moment. The problem is I was still trying to make sense of it and why it bothered him so much….
In between all the hand wringing and the eye darting he was telling me about how he could not control his lust for women. His desire to press the flesh of a woman right next to his own body. This would be okay if I was talking to anyone else but he had a relationship with God. A strong relationship with a God who said to look upon a woman is committing adultery with her in his heart. His Christianity made him a man of integrity, honesty, kindness and of victory over temptation…. except for in this one battlefield. And all this I could understand. The fight for him was real. The reality of having to fight the desires that went against God and against all the good he knew. The fight to gain self-control through the strength God gave him. The fight to resist the magnetic draw of the female forehead…..
Yes, foreheads! That was his problem, that was the trigger. Now you can see why I could relate to his whole circumstance except this part. I did not know whether to laugh or slap him and tell him to snap out of it. Come on! It is the forehead. I mean you don’t hear people say things like “She is so hot! How can you deny the beauty of that forehead!?” They don’t pick which super models will grace the cover based on their sexy forehead!
But the shame, the concern, the battle scars written all over his face…. These were familiar to those I had seen in the eyes of someone struggling with porn, or another friend struggling to keep their marriage together, in the mirror. These and the still small voice that told me to listen were the things that kept me from bursting out laughing….. well those and the fact that I recognised helpless when I saw it.
However, part of me thinks he is the problem. There have to be a few screws loose or a childhood trauma, or a demon in him. He can not be right in the head.
What he should do is control his eyes. Look down, wear a blindfold, wear a baseball cap, do something to stop this trigger. His lust is the problem. He is the problem. He has to be…. It is just foreheads for crying out loud!
But here he was crying out loud for help. And there is no way that the women of the world would give up their freedom to dress as they want and cover their foreheads to make sure that he makes it into heaven… Unless they loved him that much. I mean that would be a crazy kind of love. Where he could walk in a room full of women who knew of his weakness and cared enough to help him as far as possible. Imagine a room full of women wearing all sorts of headgear. Bandannas, headbands, headdresses and one who just throws a tea towel over her face as soon as he walks in, just to show their support in his struggle, even if just for a day. Where his brothers and sisters in Christ would pray for him and try to understand the magnetic pull of the curvy, sensual, female forehead. And show him that while he is the only one struggling with foreheads, he is not the only one fighting the good fight, And yes, the fight is good. That is unreal and unreasonable to ask for. Unrealistic.
Of course it is unreal. Because the whole story is made up. There is no friend of mine struggling with the sex appeal of foreheads. But just think. The uniqueness of each person’s struggle against addictions, sin and its triggers are very real. Does our love for each other drive us to try help each other and not think of ourselves for at least a few minutes? I expect a room full of women in headgear or women throwing tea towels over their heads just as much as I expect a room full of men poking out their eyes. But what I would really like to see is someone on their knees in prayer before they leave their house asking the Lord to help us be a pillar of support to the next struggler, a light to the next seeker.
I strongly suspect if we actually loved each other and loved God supremely we would cover some things (not necessarily our foreheads) in love.
-image credit: Hold On by ArcZero